Vitamin L for me

I will post a longer update later. I actually wrote a fairly long piece about how this got me, but not in English. I will try to translate it some other time.

Leave me a comment or a mail if all the details of the shrink appointment are interesting. I wrote some of them in an email that I can easily copy here. I also wrote down the variety of options of meds that were offered, along with my thoughts on each. I can copy that here if it is interesting (and may do it even if it isn’t). I have no idea whether that is or not. Sometimes I like to read blogs to see what other people have to say about certain meds, because, let’s face it, they take them and the shrinks don’t. If anyone wants to know pretty much all the options and my personal thoughts on them, fine.

In the meantime, I am two days into vitamin L. I feel horrible physically (stomach, taste in mouth, feel like all my nerves got stung or something), and also am – joy – hypomanic. Hence the staying up all last night writing. I need to go back and clean up what I wrote, because at three AM I just wanted to finish writing, so that I could say I at least did something. I finally finished around 8:30 AM. I’m so scattered that it took me about a day and a half to write three pages. I think that while it won’t stand alone as an essay, there are some bits I will be able to pull out of it for sometime in the future.

Then, I tried to sleep, maybe made it for an hour of broken sleep, then got back up racing again to fix more things in what I wrote. A second read-through, also with an eye to pull out any details that might seem too manic – things that fit together because of sounds or overly loose association. I have been trying to sleep since, since I have to work from 4 to 10 PM tonight, and will be even more physically miserable. I am unable to eat. Probably will lose some weight on this one, at least until I get more used to it. Not sure how I feel about that. I was liking my round, woman’s body. And I finally got clothes that fit it. Whatever, though. If I can be sane, it’s worth it.


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